Adam J. Choit

What can I say, I’m pretty much a Words with Friends junkie.  I suppose that’s better than being, well, a regular junkie.  But nevertheless, it’s probably an addiction I could do without.  My story is, when I play random users, I tend to have a pretty good record.  But when playing against people I know, I often struggle more.  Oh well.  Not that this is always the case of course, but since I began playing Words with Friends, I generally tend to beat the same people over and over again, and also typically lose to the same people over and over again.

When trailing in a game, it goes without saying how discouraging this can be for some of us (me).  But I rarely give up on a game (mentally), and even less frequently click “resign” in the middle of a duel.  After all, I’ve been involved in some games that have had some dramatic comebacks, and have been on both the winning and losing sides of games such as these.  When trailing, you really just gotta be patient, continue to play your game, and not take the 17 point word risking giving up an 80 point one.

But I hate it when the other person reaches the next digit in the hundreds before me — even in a game that’s relatively close and still within reach.  It’s like, I’d almost rather be down 347-308, than be down 330-292…even though being down 330-292 would put me closer to my opponent than the other score.  I’d just rather be in the 300′s, like my opponent.  It “looks better.”

“Ooh look at me.  I’m in the 300′s and you’re not yet.  Bet you’d like to know how this feels.” —- That’s what I hear in my opponent’s head when they reach the next digit in the hundreds column before me.

But yes, I’m not insane, and will always in actuality prefer to be down 38 points as opposed to 39.

But whether you’re down 38, 39, 50, or 100 points, I encourage you all not to give up.  Stay focused, play your game, and keep at it.

..now only if I was as determined in other, more important areas of my life….

Obviously, I understand why calling Native Americans “Indians” completely makes no sense, and is offensive.  After all, Indians are from India, and you’d think maybe 500 years and a few genocides or so later that the white man would’ve realized this error.  But nope, Columbus thought you were Indians, so to too many people, that’s what you still are –  the few of you still remaining that is.

Now, I don’t mind calling black people African-American, or black, or whatever overwhelmingly is desired by this group of people.  It’s just that in this hyper-politically correct world in which we live, I feel like we sometimes get the absurd notion that just by changing the name of a group of people, it improves their overall situation, so to speak.

Comedian Wanda Sykes actually mentions this in one her of acts, that once the term African-American came along into popularity, the quality of her life was not improved at all…not even in the least bit.  In fact, according to Wikipedia, surveys show “…the majority of Black Americans have no preference for “African American” or “black,” although they have a slight preference for “black” in personal settings and “African American” in more formal settings..”

But the definition of what constitutes a personal setting, and a formal setting can be a bit unclear at times, in my opinion.  If anything, I think what this could mean is that, if you’re not African-American, you’re probably better off playing it safe by just using the term African-American.  But once again, what does this prove exactly?  I mean, in a country where most African Americans don’t care if you call them black, what’s wrong with just using black most of the time, if not all the time?

I think the funniest thing to me about all this, is watching white people get all baffled, not always knowing which term to use.  I love that occasional hesitation in the voice, when a white person has to make it known for whatever reason someone is black.  “Yes, I saw Bob in line.  He was standing right behind that bla–, err I mean African-American man.”  As if you’re going to offend people by saying black, even though it’s a term overwhelmingly no one takes any issue with.

Anyone ever tell you that?  Humans will often tell each other, “you need to get out more” when the person is in the midst of “nerding out.”  I mean, if I’m being way overly analytical and statistical about sports for example, someone might tell me, “You really need to get out more.”  It doesn’t have to be sports, but really any obsession requires a break at one point or another.  If someone has been playing Xbox for the last 36 hours straight, they probably “need to get out more.”

In saying all that though, getting out more isn’t always the solution.  I reached this conclusion the other day.  I was in the car riding shotgun, with my friend at the wheel.  He announced to me that later that day his car was going to hit 123,456 (or 1-2-3-4-5-6) miles on the odometer.  He noted this rather meaningless milestone with a sense of both pride and joy.  I told him he needed to get out more.  Soon thereafter though, I realized my suggestion may not have been the best one.  The thing is, if he’s already significantly over 120,000 miles on his car, hasn’t he been doing his share of going out already?

Not that I ever had the desire to “go out” every night of the week, but I’ve known people who tend (or at one time in his/her life) to go out four, five, or even six nights a week, drinking and partying.  And some of them are not even alcoholics.  Nevertheless, going out that much comes with it’s costs.  Well, literally the cost/money itself could be an issue –  in addition to the toll it takes on the body/lack of sleep/hangovers, etc.

So, while some people probably do need to get out more, others probably need to stay in more.  Staying in too much can make you crazy, but going out too much can do the same.  It’s all about balance, people — and also choosing the right condescending words to your friends when you want to bust their balls (or ovaries, for that matter).

This whole thing kind of confuses me.  Whether it’s Facebook, Twitter, or whatever — very often people will create posts on the Internet in which they will self-censor themselves.  Specifically on Facebook, I’m sure you’ve seen people post stuff like, “What a f#*kin’ sh*tty day today was.”

Ok, first of all, everyone knows which words you are using — “fuckin” and “shitty.”  So if everyone already knows what you’re saying, why not just say it?  I think perhaps when obscenities are typed out in their natural state, they read more harshly to people.  Isn’t that the point of using curse words in the first place though? — to be bold, to make statements stronger, etc.  I mean, if your fuckin’ shitty day wasn’t really that fuckin’ shitty, then don’t say it was.

If you don’t feel comfortable cursing, and doing so is “just not you,” just stick to words like “friggin” or “frickin” or “effin.”  If you really did have a fuckin’ shitty day, and feel the need to tell people, I say don’t censor yourself.  Who or what exactly is being protected by using symbols in place of letters?

If you’re attempting to protect kids that might be able view such foul language (on Facebook), you should:

a) Change privacy settings to limit who can see curse words you post or b) just not use them

Otherwise, you’re really just insulting the intelligence of kids by attempting to censor yourself — as if they aren’t smart enough to decipher what you’re saying.  As much as I don’t like it, I can at least understand the thought process in terms of why newspapers (I think they still exist) or network television might blur or bleep obscenities —- but your 11 year old cousin will not be scarred for life if you post on Facebook that you had a “fuckin’ shitty day”

But if you do post that you had a “f#*kin’ sh*tty day,” your cousin will probably just think you are a p*ssy — errr, I mean pussy.

Before I continue on, yes, I know he isn’t known as Puff Daddy these days.

Listen, I come from the school of thought that if someone wants to change his/her name, he or she has the right to.  I’m agree with the old Jewish man in the barber shop in the brilliant film, Coming to America. “If a man wants to be called Muhammed Ali, godammit this is a free country, you should respect his wishes, and call the man Muhammed Ali.”

If Chad Johnson wants to be called Chad Ocho Cinco, fine.  If Ron Artest wants to be Metta World Peace, go for it.  Now, I may think it’s stupid and make fun of it, but I’ll call you by whatever you want, and won’t complain that you should change back to your birth name.

With this Puff Daddy, I have no idea if he’s ever processed any official paperwork when he’s changed his names, but nevertheless what impresses me is that everyone goes along with him — and as far as I can recall and see, nobody has any real issues with the name changes.  In fact, whether he’s “Puff Daddy”, “P. Diddy”, “Sean Combs,” “Puffy,” or just “Diddy,” (etc etc), the media and just about everyone else in the world seems to play along by keeping up.

I think part of it is that white people want to seem hip, and with it, so it’s prudent to keep up with all of Diddy’s name changes.

Anyway, sure, people like Kareem Abdul-Jabbar can change a name once and have everyone along for the ride, but Mr. Puffy-Sean-Puff-Daddy-Metta-Combs seems to change that shiz every five minutes and we not only eat it up, but we keep up, too!

I realize that “old” is a relative term, but it really annoys when someone describes a particular song as “soooooo old.”  If someone describes a song that came out within the last two years as old, you know this person probably has terrible taste in music, and is more interested in following trends, rather than being appreciative of what is good art.

I’ll go out on a limb and say anyone who describes a song that came out within the last five to ten years as old is a ridiculous person.  DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG MUSIC HAS BEEN AROUND FOR?  The answer is forever.

It’s not even so much that saying a song is old bothers me, but more so often the tone of how people sometimes say it.  “That song is sooooooooooo old” —– as if music can expire or something.

Oh and coming soon, I will deal with people who annoyingly use the term “played out…”

You ever notice that’s usually what people say when they have absolutely no intention of returning that piece of paper.  Some of the language we use is really quite comical, or at the very least often inaccurate.

When you ask someone to borrow a piece of paper or to borrow a pencil, you’re not going to return those things.  Don’t ask to borrow!  What you really mean is, “Can I have..?”

On some subconscious level, as humans we’d prefer to lie to one another and fake politeness, rather than be straight forward.  Perhaps I’m just a little too upset about this.

I have to admit, I’m pretty much an addict at this point.  No, it’s not drugs or alcohol (I don’t think), and no it’s not gambling.

Yup, I’m addicted to Words with Friends, the mobile phone word game.  It’s basically Scrabble, but with a few minor differences.  Most notably, the double and triple letter/word score boxes appear in different places on the board than they do on a standard Scrabble board.

Also, as compared to Scrabble, there is no challenging the other player’s words on the board, and the game will just tell you if a word you attempt isn’t acceptable.  In addition, WWF games tend to last hours, days, and sometimes even weeks — since players can pretty much take as much time as they want before making a move.

With Words with Friends, one can play up to 20 games at a time.  Now despite my addiction, I’m proud to say I don’t think I’ve ever had more than 12 games going at any given time.  Although I’ve never reached the 20 game maximum, perhaps my addiction is highlighted in the fact that overwhelmingly, I’m usually waiting for my opponents to make their moves, and not the other way around.

Perhaps this just means I’m on top of things —- or maybe I’m just on top of my Words with Friends games, and not other, more important things in my life.

I really don’t know what this says about these two groups of people, but nevertheless, there are two kinds of people in life — those waiting for others to make their moves in Words with Friends, and those who’ve yet to make their moves.

The other day I was chatting online with my friend Steve, and like 98% of our conversations, this wasn’t one of the serious nature in the least bit.

Hey started typing in capital letters by mistake, but went with it:

Steve:  I’M ONLY USING CAPS — I’M YELLIN EVERYTHING.

This is when I had to explain to him that using caps (this all applies to texting too) does not necessarily equal yelling.

Using exclamation points means yelling:

“This is yelling!”

Using capital letters just means that either you’re trying to be really clear about something, or possibly sarcastic.

“batteries are in the TOP DRAWER.”

or

“YES.  I HONESTLY THINK SARAH PALIN IS A BRIGHT WOMAN.”

Now, you can also use exclamation points with capital letters as well sometimes.

“THIS IS YELLING!”

That was yelling, and these are the rules.

Back on August 29th, 2010, just for shits and giggles, I posted a blog that listed a bunch of searched terms that landed people on this site.  You can view that post here:

http://thestabbingpen.com/2010/08/29/searched-terms-that-got-people-here/

Here’s a few more for ya that have come up recently:

“how to respond to someone who says i hate religion”

“pens made for stabbing”

“bb king fat”

“glory hole locations in massachusetts”

“knock, knock, i jerk you off”

“fuck accidentally bought tuna in vegetable oil”

“horatio fellatio, milwaukee”

“amputees clarkston wa”

“seinfeld papi didnt wash his hands”

Good stuff.